Wait

Has anyone really researched what the word wait actually implies? Does it mean just sitting on our hands and doing nothing? It doesn't mean not doing anything but worrying. Some people think if they're not doing anything, they need to worry about doing nothing. Or keep thinking the "what if's" of doing nothing.
To me waiting means not thinking about the situation. Trusting God with the outcome. Which means trusting Him with the details. That's the how and why. Trust me it probably won't get solved in the time you would like or the manner that you would like, but it will be handled.
Wait, but still do the normal stuff(except the normal worrying).

Coming soon

Well, we're going to start having bible study at the house starting on next Wednesday.  I sure hope that people are ministered to and set free but most of all I hope that people can get thier needs met spiritually, as well as physically.  I hope that people don't come here and leave with more chains on them than when they walked in the front door.  I hope the person that's leading the Bible study will be acute to what the Holy Spirit is doing, and not ignore that small quiet voice.   

Parents

My parents have been married for close to 50 years. I don't understand how they've been married for so long. They've tolerated each other, but I don't think they've ever been happy with each other.
Every once in a while my dad threatens to fix the car so that she can't go to work, or takes the keys, because she won't clean the house. He keeps doing it like she's going to one day realize that she needs to clean the house. Which this has been going on ever since I've been alive, and it still hasn't made her do anything different.
Sometimes I feel like the parent.
I wish they would either live in seperate places or just resolve themselves to being miserable with each other. So I could get some peace.

Buying cards

Every Mother's Day I have the same delema.  Since my Mom and I never had a loving nuturing relationship, none of the cards that are appreciative seem to fit.  So I'm stuck with the humorous ones. Which alot of those don't fit us either.  

     I've always felt like my "showing up" on this earth was just an interruption in her life for the almost 18 years I lived at home. Loved and wanted by her, isn't the words I would have used to describe how I felt as a child.  Because I felt like  I wasn't wanted, I was extremely mouthy. I was intent on doing things my way, because I felt alone, and felt like if I didn't look out for myself, no one else was going to.   

     I'm almost 41 years old now, and the relationship she and I have is  better.  I guess in it's own way has evolved in the caring relationship that would have occured  otherwise, just a little scarred.     

    My daddy wasn't around alot, because he was a truck driver.  He and I got along great.  He spent alot of time with me when he was home.   I really felt loved by him, because he actually cared about me and would take time with me to just talk with me.  

I hope I can remember this

I wish sometimes I could have a recorder with me all the time to remind me of the "light-bulb" moments that I have. I think I need to start journaling again, so I will have some way of recalling things that the Holy Spirit shows me.

I was watching Melissa Scott and she was teaching on Eph 4:1-7. It was a simple thing but as you and I both know the simple things that are shown to us are sometimes HUGE.

The first thing was 4:1 the word worthy , which if you look it up in Strongs it actual is suppose to read worthily. Which says volumes. Which to me means you ain't gotta walk or be or live perfect. You just have to be willing to walk worthily.

Another thing is we ( by we I mean I) pray like we think God has absolutely no idea what's going on with us. Yes he wants us to pray about things, but I'm realizing that He wants us to pray to submit the situation to Him. I'm beginning to realize that we're here to be a help to each other, but especially to people that don't know God. If we do that, then he'll take care of our essential needs. I'm also beginning to believe that most of our prayers need to be either thanksgiving type prayers, or submission to His will type prayers.

What do you think about that??

Lessons Learned

If I've learned nothing else, it's to keep it simple. When it comes right down to the walking this thing out. It's always to come back to trusting God, and knowing no matter what, He knows what's best. It's a simple thing, but yet it holds so much.
It is also so easy to forget, especially when things of life are being thrown in front of our face on a constant basis. The overwhelming feeling of drowning in the circumstances that surround us. Since we can't really see what "good" this is doing us, to think that we're reaping what we've sown for some sort of lacking of faith in days past, or this is suppose to teach us something about dying to self.
When in all actuality it could be God trying to get us to trust Him with a part of our lives we've desperatly held on to for too long. Or we could be focusing on the circumstances that surround us instead of Him.
That is usually true in my case. I do more thinking than I do praying. When I'm faced with things. For some reason I think God can actually hear what I'm thinking, so He knows what's going on. Instead of of telling Him how I'm feeling or what I'm afraid of. I think that if Satan can get my thoughts off the truth of God, then the battle is won. I hope to get to the place where I can know right away when a thought enters my mind, if it's fear or faith.